Dear Mexican: Where did the notion come from of adding an -o to the end of an English word and assuming that makes it a Spanish word?

Juanito

Dear Wab: โ€œAnglos have long held power in making Spanish and Spanish-speaking culture invisible,โ€ writes University of South Florida assistant professor of foreign language education Adam Schwartz in his excellent essay โ€œMockery and Appropriation of Spanish in White Spaces: Perceptions of Latinos in the United States,โ€ published in the 2011 publication The Handbook of Hispanic Sociolinguistics. โ€œBut Spanish can be made selectively visible for the purposes of Mock Spanish,โ€ a term popularized by legendary University of Arizona anthropologist Jane H. Hill to refer to what gabachos have deemed acceptable Spanglishโ€”think terms like โ€œvaya con Dios,โ€ โ€œcojones,โ€ โ€œmaรฑana, maรฑana,โ€ and โ€œchinga tu pinche madre, pinche puto pendejo baboso.โ€

As Schwartz points out in his work, the addition of the masculine -o suffix to Mexicanize English arose both from its widespread use in popular culture (think โ€œNo comprendoโ€ or โ€œDrinko de Mayoโ€) and by gabachos taking Spanish classes in high school and college, and only remembering one part of the languageโ€™s grammatical structure to bend for their racist needs. โ€œThis reclamation by Anglo monolinguals of the Spanish language itself is indeed a fashionable actโ€”there is something oddly chic and cool about embracing the stereotype of ignorant gringo,โ€ Schwartz writes.

And full disclosureโ€”he was kind enough to cite this columna in the piece, which we find awesome-o!

Being one of two gabachos in my neighborhood in Denver, Iโ€™m wondering exactly how many Mexicans can fit in one car.

This is a broad question, so assume that in a two-parent family, there are six kids, three of which have three kids. The age range will be from around 50 years old to 5 months. Weโ€™ll also assume that itโ€™s Sunday, and as many family members as possible need to get out on Federal (Boulevard). The car would most likely be a two-door Chevy truck, or a Saturn sedan on 20-inch rims.

Craving Some Chubbys!

Dear Gabacho: Depends on the situationโ€”a Mexican car expands and contracts according to need like the Mexican mail panza.

Car goes to church? Only women can fit inโ€”and since theyโ€™re prim and proper, the max is 10. Going to a party? 25. To school? Just one adult, and all the neighborhood chamacos who can fit themselves in the foot-rest part of the carro. And if a car is going to a Republican function? It magically doesnโ€™t fit anyone other than the vendido cousin driving it.

Like my Mexican co-workers, Iโ€™m a migrant to the City of Angels. In my home state of Louisiana, there is an integral distinction to be made among folks whether one is Protestant or Catholic. But ask a Mexican what a non-Catholic Christian is, and they will tell you โ€œChristian.โ€ But a Catholic is a Christian.

Iโ€™ve inquired, and Mexicans donโ€™t seem to have a word for โ€œProtestant.โ€ In fact, there are many words that are basic to my vocabulary that donโ€™t seem to translate into Spanish, i.e., โ€œself-esteemโ€ and โ€œdesk drawers.โ€ Why is this?

New Angelino

Dear Gabacho: Of course a Catholic is a Christianโ€”now, can you tell that to evangelicals? As for your translation queries: A Protestant is a protestante; desk drawers are cajones del escritorio; and โ€œself-esteemโ€ is tequila.

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